Tim Allen On Cars & Comedy

Size doesn’t matter to Tim Allen—at least when it comes to cars. In this episode, the car buff shows off his Volkswagen Beetle with a 200-hp engine and his Studebaker Sleeper Cab that doubles as a campground for his four-year-old daughter. Plus, the funnyman gives us a tour of his other obsessive collections.

Released on 8/13/2013

Credits

Starring: Tim Allen and Matt D'Andria

Transcript

00:00
Ugh
00:07
what?
00:12
(upbeat music)
00:18
where do you get these questions?
00:22
Hi, I'm Tim Allen
00:23
and I'm a Gemini.
00:24
What I do with my cars is I try to make
00:26
lesser people feel terrible about their lives.
00:34
We bought this on an episode of Home Improvement from Jay.
00:38
Leno played a character
00:40
I saw that episode.
00:41
In his jumpsuit.
00:42
Yeah,
00:43
I saw that.
00:43
And a bad actor.
00:44
He hasn't gotten any better.
00:45
I saw that, and I knew
00:46
it was just downhill from there with Jay.
00:48
His whole career just died.
00:49
It's over for him.
00:50
Look here's what you do,
00:52
it's a smash box,
00:53
no syncros up or down,
00:55
you try to find the gear,
00:56
go like this,
00:57
and he hangs up.
00:58
You get like three,
00:58
Jay?
00:59
That's it.
01:00
I often get in these cars nude and just sit.
01:03
If you saw me undress,
01:05
you'd go whoa,
01:06
what are women missing.
01:08
Chiseled like a rock.
01:09
Six packs, kegs, I got every,
01:12
every acronym for a licker,
01:14
built in.
01:18
Come this way.
01:20
Look out.
01:21
What happens if you get near 200 horse power
01:23
in a Volkswagen?
01:24
What happens?
01:25
What happens, is you have a,
01:28
a engine that barely fits in the engine compartment,
01:31
and it's clearly close to undrivable.
01:34
Cause you get yourself on Mullholland Drive,
01:36
boy this is fast,
01:37
and you're this close to the windshield,
01:39
and you're going and I'm in a Volkswagen.
01:41
This would be one of those
01:42
what was Tim thinking,
01:44
as they pull me out of the wreckage,
01:46
so here it sits.
01:48
What am I doing now?
01:50
Hand built this.
01:51
Hand built the bumpers.
01:53
Curious.
01:55
Not an airport anywhere near here.
02:01
Don't trip, don't, look out there's a hole,
02:02
there's a pit, a snake.
02:05
So I see this in a car magazine,
02:07
and there's a guy in Pennsylvania.
02:10
He rebuilt everything,
02:11
and he I just was I,
02:12
my dad worked for the company.
02:14
There's five of these.
02:15
First sleeper that Studebaker made.
02:17
I'm just, I was shocked at the pictures,
02:20
so I had to have it.
02:20
The guys that drove these must have said,
02:22
boy are we living now.
02:24
Cause they drove those trucks that had the open fronts.
02:25
Yeah.
02:26
It was just one step away from Come on, yah
02:30
This has a sleeper in it.
02:32
And my little kid and I think that this is the most fun.
02:34
Now she's four.
02:37
And we camp.
02:38
Only four year olds can get this close to your head,
02:40
and they don't that's weird.
02:41
I just think it's weird to kids have no,
02:43
what is that spacial thing.
02:45
You know we don't want to do this.
02:46
You don't.
02:47
There's something wrong here.
02:48
[Female] So you're just going to speaking directly
02:49
to the camera,
02:50
and I'm gonna ask you,
02:51
Is that a real camera?
02:53
I collect robots and sci-fi stuff,
02:55
and cell phones.
02:58
I've got antique cell phones.
03:00
I had a little girl in here,
03:01
one of my guys' daughters.
03:03
She says what's wrong with you?
03:04
That's her response to this.
03:06
So I fired him and sent her home.
03:08
Buzz Light year.
03:09
See how he's put.
03:11
Buzz ahead of Woody.
03:13
Cause I got a better,
03:14
literally built better than Woody.
03:18
I mean look how he's got,
03:19
look at the legs.
03:20
They're made of fabric,
03:22
no crotch.
03:23
I actually have a crotch.
03:24
You know.
03:26
That's very important to me.
03:28
Tim, thank you so much.
03:30
(laughter)
03:33
Perfect.
03:34
And cut.
03:35
That's it.
03:38
To see more episodes of Car Collectors,
03:40
subscribe to GQ.com
03:52
Son of a