Amy Schumer Goes Undercover on Twitter, Instagram, and YouTube

On this episode of "Actually Me," Amy Schumer goes undercover on Instagram, Twitter, Quora, YouTube, Wikipedia and more sites. Now that Amy Schumer is married, what is she going to make jokes about? Is she still friends with Jennifer Lawrence? Why did she chose to become a comedian? Find all that out and more in this video. Amy Schumer stars in "I Feel Pretty," which debuts in theaters April 20th.

Released on 4/16/2018

Credits

Starring: Amy Schumer

Transcript

00:00
Hi guys.
00:00
It's Amy Schumer and today
00:02
I'm going undercover on the internet.
00:04
This is Actually Me.
00:07
(upbeat music)
00:09
Let's start with Yahoo.
00:12
Describe Amy Schumer in one word.
00:15
Oh man there's 36 answers.
00:17
Model.
00:18
Next.
00:20
How do I overcome the disappointment
00:22
when someone says they don't get Amy Schumer's humor?
00:27
I don't know.
00:28
That's tough.
00:29
I think there's no way to get over it.
00:31
I think maybe you take like a year.
00:33
Go to Nepal and just walk.
00:36
Why is Amy Schumer so sexy?
00:40
That's a good question.
00:41
I've often wondered that.
00:43
I think it's genetics.
00:44
I go to the gym 10 times a day.
00:47
I never eat food and a lot of plastic surgery and that's me.
00:56
So now that Amy Schumer is married,
00:59
wtf is she going to make jokes about?
01:03
I mean I like that people just think
01:04
you stop having sex when you get married.
01:07
I just got married.
01:08
Give me a fucking second, Jake Woolverton.
01:12
Can I call Amy Schumer my best friend
01:14
if we've never met?
01:15
Yeah, I see no problem with that.
01:18
You are my best friend except
01:19
I can't pronounce your last name.
01:20
Kate Muekusch.
01:23
Muekusch.
01:24
Are Amy Schumer and Jennifer Lawrence still friends?
01:26
Remember when we were somehow reminded every hour
01:30
of every day that they were?
01:32
Now we're not and I actually wanna know.
01:33
People are like, they're really rubbing
01:35
their friendship in our face, but really we just hung out.
01:37
But people take pictures of her wherever she goes, so yeah.
01:42
I've got other friends.
01:43
What about Rachel Feinstein, my best friend.
01:47
Bridget Everett, Jessica Sapienza from Long Island.
01:50
Nobody's asking about her.
01:52
YouTube.
01:56
[Reporter] Do you tip well?
01:57
Yes.
01:58
[Reporter] More than 15%?
02:00
Yes.
02:02
[Reporter] More than 20?
02:03
Sometimes, yeah.
02:05
I mean like when it's appropriate, yes.
02:09
Oh jeez, oh gosh.
02:11
I'm a bad tipper okay?
02:13
I cannot confirm nor deny that Jennifer is a bad tipper
02:17
because she's also the friend who will forget her wallet.
02:21
She'll call herself like a rich deadbeat
02:23
and she's like oh, does anyone have any money
02:25
and we're like you are rich, Jen.
02:28
You know, not that I don't have money,
02:29
but I don't know Hungry Games money.
02:32
I never, you know, killed a robotic dog
02:34
and tried to eat Nightlock,
02:37
but I'm sure she tips well.
02:39
She's a woman of the people, but she's frugal.
02:42
She is frugal, no question.
02:44
She likes to bargain.
02:46
Don't get me wrong.
02:47
Amy is very talented.
02:48
But I wonder, if sex didn't exist,
02:50
would Amy have any material?
02:52
That's a really good hypothetical.
02:54
It's funny.
02:55
If anybody really broke down my jokes, it would be about
02:57
10-15% about sex because it's a chick.
03:01
I think people are still like,
03:07
women aren't supposed to enjoy sex.
03:09
Like you just do it because you want to make babies.
03:12
It's like no, we also would like to come.
03:17
IMDB.
03:19
Claims to have kept detailed journals
03:21
of every day of her life between
03:22
the ages of 13 and 23.
03:24
Yes that is true.
03:25
I think IMDB should say that I can levitate.
03:32
Ow.
03:35
Trademarks.
03:36
After all punchlines, Schumer says y'see?
03:43
GoodReads.
03:46
Does anyone else love the title
03:48
The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo.
03:49
I love it.
03:52
I think ti's a good title.
03:54
Submitted.
03:57
You may not believe it, but it's actually me.
04:00
Was Amy Schumer on Judge Judy today?
04:02
If not, that lady looks a lot like her.
04:04
I guess you have to be an extra
04:06
on crappy tv after making crappy movies.
04:08
How about who cares about me
04:10
and it looks like Angelina Jolie
04:12
is right behind me in this pictures?
04:13
Yeah, I got to be an extra on Judge Judy so.
04:16
I'm living my dreams so don't get mad about that.
04:17
Just go live yours.
04:19
I took the steps to get in the audience on Judge Judy.
04:23
You take the steps to do whatever it is you want to do.
04:24
Haters.
04:27
Does anyone else think my awkward elementary school photo
04:30
looks like a brunette Amy Schumer?
04:32
Finally found my celebrity look-a-like.
04:34
Twinsies.
04:35
I could see it.
04:36
I think I look like that little chick.
04:38
Yeah, I guess I'm your mother.
04:43
Is it just me or does young Chris Jericho
04:45
kinda look like Amy Schumer?
04:47
Well, you know, I have spoken to Chris Jericho
04:49
about this and I am so flattered.
04:51
He's a beautiful man and I would like
04:53
to be considered a beautiful man too.
04:56
More Yahoo Answers.
04:59
What do you think about Amy Schumer
05:01
playing a future Doctor Who?
05:02
Not only would she be the first ever female Doctor,
05:04
but the first American to play the Doctor.
05:06
They already got a chick, brah.
05:09
Is Amy Schumer a real person?
05:15
Hell yeah or I don't know why they gave her a period.
05:20
Quora.
05:23
Why did Amy Schumer choose to become a comedian?
05:26
I think 'cause I knew one day the internet would be
05:29
invented and I'd get to read
05:31
really useful comments from really smart people.
05:37
Why does Amy Schumer talk about her vagina so much?
05:41
That's a good question.
05:43
If I talk about it for three minutes
05:45
of an hour, is that so much?
05:46
You're gonna think about your genitals.
05:49
Every time I pee, I wipe that vagina.
05:52
Every time I have sex, someone's fucking that vagina.
05:55
It's on my mind.
05:57
What are you thinking about, your toes?
06:01
Who are Amy Schumer's influences?
06:03
My pussy.
06:09
The Muppets.
06:11
If I like Amy Schumer,
06:12
what other current comedians should I check out?
06:14
Oh, that's a good question.
06:16
I would say, I love Chelsea Peretti.
06:19
Her special, One of the Greats, is on Netflix.
06:22
Jessi Klein, Michelle Wolf, Rachel Feinstein,
06:25
Nikki Glaser, Natash Leggero, Bridget Everett,
06:29
Margaret Cho, Chelsea Handler, Sarah Silverman,
06:32
Judy Gold, Jessica Kirson.
06:35
Why aren't there more women in comedy?
06:37
There are.
06:39
Go look at them.
06:41
What are the best Inside Amy Schumer sketches?
06:44
That's tough to answer.
06:45
I'm really proud of my episode
06:47
12 Angry Men Inside Amy Schumer.
06:50
Wikipedia.
06:53
Amy was voted both class clown
06:55
and teacher's worst nightmare upon graduation in 1999.
06:57
She also attended the Hebrew school
06:59
of Central Synagogue of Nassau County.
07:01
This is all true except they didn't include
07:02
Teacher's worst nightmare in the yearbook even though
07:05
I was voted teacher's worst nightmare
07:06
because I think the other, the male version
07:10
who won it like lodged a complaint,
07:12
like his parents didn't want it in the yearbook,
07:14
but I was proud.
07:16
In 2007, I recorded a Live at Gotham, Last Comic Standing.
07:19
She recalled that she thought of
07:21
the episode as her big break.
07:22
Yeah, when you're a stand-up or a performer,
07:25
you think everything's your big break.
07:27
You're like I got it, this is it.
07:29
I'm ready to sign my rich and famous papers, but
07:31
I don't know, it's 11 years later and a lot of people
07:34
just heard of me like a year ago
07:36
and a lot of people never heard of me so
07:37
maybe I'll make it soon.
07:41
Welp, that's it.
07:42
I answered all your questions on the internet.
07:44
You didn't know as much as you thought about me, did you?
07:53
Fuck you.
07:55
I was supposed to play Red Sparrow.
07:57
(group laughs)